In 2013, determined to “get out there”, I went on exactly 30 first dates. I didn’t set out to go on this many; it just sort of happened as I stumbled across interesting men while browsing the online dating site OKCupid. Most dates just consisted of coffee or a glass of wine and then parting ways forever, and the majority were unremarkable. A few produced friends, or lovers, or lovers that became friends. There are a handful of one-night stands, and one or two that were downright awful. These are the stories of some of them.
He’s athletic, in the way that shows he spends more time in the gym than reading. Another woman would find it attractive, but I don’t.
This is my first date of 2013.
He talks about his mid-level sales job, workout regimen, and protein powder supplements. To connect, I mention that I’ve lost a lot of weight about a year ago. He looks me up and down – I’m perched on the bar stool next to him – and I see he thinks I’m too heavy still, even though my dating profile photos are carefully chosen to look flattering, but honest.
“I try not to be obsessed about it, but I count calories using my phone.”
“It sounds like you ARE obsessed. You keep talking about it.”
It’s out of left field, but I shrug instead of stammer. He’s being rude because he’s bored, and giving him the satisfaction of getting riled up isn’t worth it to me. There is “playing nice” which is what I’m technically doing, but in actuality, I just don’t care enough. My “wall” goes up like a car window and slides shut. I’m polite, but done.
He insists on paying for my beer which I find weird. We hug goodbye briefly before we part ways, and I go home and make dinner.