In 2013, determined to “get out there”, I went on exactly 30 first dates. I didn’t set out to go on this many; it just sort of happened as I stumbled across interesting men while browsing the online dating site OKCupid. Most dates just consisted of coffee or a glass of wine and then parting ways forever, and the majority were unremarkable. A few produced friends, or lovers, or lovers that became friends. There are a handful of one-night stands, and one or two that were downright awful. These are the stories of some of them.
As told in a bar, recently.
“So I was texting with the guy in my phone who was ‘Chris F.’, and it was getting kind of flirty, and then he invited me over. This was going to be my first official ‘booty call’, and I was excited. I got dressed and knocked on his door, and it turned out ‘Chris F.’ was NOT who I pictured. I thought I was talking to ‘Chris S.’”
“What did you do?” asked Emily, eyes wide.
I shrugged. “I fucked him!”