I have a house full of people who came from all over to visit with us here in New York, including two who attended the protest against Prop. 8 in lower Manhattan today. Of course it sparked loads of conversation, and I guess now is as good a time as any to talk about my feelings on gay marriage.

This is what I believe with every fiber of my being: I disagree with the idea of government being a part of marriage. The ONLY reason I am legally married is because it was important to Rob and our families. Since the beginning of human civilization, marriage has always been in the eye of the community, not the government. If the community did not recognize you as married, you were not. If they did, you were. The government stepped in relatively recently, and began issuing licenses for marriage as a way to keep tabs on people and control them. You know how I feel about that. (Thumbs down!) Remember, “license” is another word for “permission”. If the government didn’t approve of two people getting married, they would not give permission.

At some point, a government issued license became the hallmark of “marriage”, NOT the social recognition it always had been throughout human history. What this did was allow certain people who would have NEVER gotten society’s permission to be married to wed, most notably inter-racial couples. (Interesting to note, a mere 42 years ago, MY inter-racial marriage would not have been recognized by the government as valid.) That sounds fantastic, but it also changed the definition of marriage to be “a state of monogamy recognized by the government” instead of a covenant between two people in the eyes of God/god/whatever religion and community.

The problem now is that when people who wish to be married cannot by legal terms, society will not allow them to be married, either. Two people cannot just say, “We are married.” and have their community say, “Yes, they are.” which is how it SHOULD be, and IS in a truly free society. Now, they have to prove that the government has given them permission to be married before society will recognize them as married. It’s backwards and reversed. It’s not changing anything in people’s hearts, either.

If the government eventually allows two people of the same gender to marry, there will still be people who say, “I don’t care. I will NEVER recognize those creeps as married!” Conversely, if they never do, there will always be people who will accept, without the least bit of hesitation, two women saying, “We are married.”

I would like to see us taking marriage, in all its forms, away from the government, and putting it back in the eyes of society where it belongs.

I said to Rob the other day that now, whenever our children whine that they “can’t do it”, I will be able to say to them, “Did the first black President of the United States say ‘I can’t'?” And they’ll go “No”, and roll their eyes as I go, “Child, what did he say?” and they’ll sigh and mumble “Yes we can.” and I’ll go, “I don’t think I heard you.” and they’ll go, “Uh oh. Mom’s getting black on us.”

But whatever. I’m not raisin’ no fools.

It is an amazing, amazing day to live in a black neighborhood in New York City. At eleven on the dot last night I head my 16 year old neighbor burst out of her front door and yell, “Barack Obama!” That’s how I found out.

I ran outside, and there was literally dancing in the streets. A few doors down, a neighbor I had never met burst out of her house, arms raised in victory. I threw up my own arms, and we “woo hoo!”ed together. Another neighbor across the street spotted us. She ran out of her house and threw her arms around both of us and we cried together and shook our heads at the wonder of it all. I forgot to ask their names!

On the main street half a block down traffic slowed to a crawl. Everyone was leaning out of their cars and honking and waving and slapping high fives to the revelers who were in their way. A few older ladies came out of their apartments in housecoats and curlers. They’re “the church ladies” that I see walking to services every Sunday, and they began a chorus of “We Shall Overcome“. I joined them, but none of us could finish; we were crying too hard.

I am so happy.

I voted! I voted and I’m so proud. If you voted, even if you voted for a different candidate than I did, I’m proud of you, too. No matter what the outcome, I am so moved and enthused by the voter turn out this year. Young voters. Women voters. Just old enough voters and really, really, REALLY old ones. My kid brother voted in his first election today. Many others proudly did the same. THAT’S SO AWESOME!

If you are an American and you voted, that means you care about this country, and to you I say thank you. Thank you thank you thank you.

UPDATE: Simon Owens who writes over at Bloggasm sent me the link to an article he wrote for PBS about Web 2.0 tools that are being used during the election. This is an exciting time to be into social media… I plan on bringing my flipcam to the booth with me.

You can check out his article here: Citizens, Media Use Social Media to Monitor Election. Thanks, Simon!

The first video they’re referencing is this one. 537 people decided the last election! I’m sure it’s more complicated than that, but still. My friend Dan is having trouble getting his absentee ballot from his home state of South Dakota, and the stories of people not being able to cast their votes because of bureaucracy and shady polling practices keep popping up everywhere.

One thing about Election Day makes me angrier than voter apathy, and that’s voter disenfranchisement. If someone turns you away from the polling place or tells you that members of your party vote on Wednesday, they are being shady at best and illegal at worst. Tell someone. Get the story out. It’s not “not a big deal.” It’s your rights being squashed, and the implications of that stretch far beyond November 4.

Here are some good sources. If you know of others, let me know.

866-OUR-VOTE or 866ourvote.org
www.twittervotereport.com (if you use twitter)

These are wikis that you can use to report any closings out.
http://www.sourcewatch.org/index.php?title=Portal:Election_Protection_Wiki
www.votersuppression.net

On Saturday, two prankster DJs from Quebec got their hands on Sarah Palin’s phone number and managed to convince her that she was talking to Nicolas Sarkozy, the President of France. The phone call, full audio of which is below, went on for nearly six minutes. (Note: this is longer than the campaign allows her to talk to the press.) It’s actually very difficult for me to listen to; if I was watching it, it would be through my fingers, cringing. I kind of… feel… bad for her.

Warning, in case you play this out loud, he managed to slip a joke about “fucking” (in a reference to the porno, “Whos Nailin’ Paylin”) that went over her head; it’s all very thickly accented and fast when he says it.

I can kind of see how she would be confused. Kind of.

The best (worst?) part was that her campaign didn’t lie their assess off about it; they confirmed it.

If the woman who, in two days, has a decent shot at being one 72-year-old cancer survivor’s heart beat away from having the most important job on the planet gets punk’d for nearly 6-minutes by two yahoos from Quebec, don’t you think it should have been, I dunno, COVERED UP? Is this part of some master scheme? It seems too far out. Or is the internet really still a “wild west” of information, and these sorts of things will never really be able to be swept under the rug, with people trading information so fast that The Man can’t keep up?

Viva la internet.

Don’t be a dumbass.

Heads up! On Election Day, we will be voting for other offices besides President. Do you know who’s running? Get a sample of the ballot you’ll be working with on November 4 and research the candidates and issues that you’ll be looking at. Don’t just vote down party lines, and please, for the love, don’t just vote for the person with the nicest name because that’s all you know of them. (If that IS your preferred method, do the rest of us a favor: sterilize yourself.)

I have my towns sample ballot, and I’m researching the candidates now, writing down my choices, and bringing a cheat sheet into the booth with me. Local politics are important, too, and, given the shady shenanigans of the past couple of elections, it may be the strongest voice you have.

Some states will have also have some special questions on them (like voting on Proposition 8 in California). Make sure you understand what the questions are and how you feel about them before you get to the polling place. Don’t just stand there behind the curtains scratching your head about what they mean. You might be voting for something you don’t actually believe in.

DON’T BE A DUMBASS!

If the above embed doesn’t work, go here: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/real-women-respond-to-palin-webathon

or here: http://womenrespondtopalin.com/

In 2000 I idealistically voted for Nader. I wasn’t really “into” listening to the political commentary, and the little bit of research I did lead me to vote with my heart, not to influence the election. I still stand by that vote.

By 2004, I was horrified and disgusted by the aftermath of September 11th and 2003′s start of the Iraqi war, which I protested against, lost sleep over, and, five and a half years later (or, worse, 4188 American deaths later), disagree with and despise more than ever. For the first time in my life I contributed money to a campaign: Howard Dean. I was heart-broken when he lost the primary. In the final election, Kerry didn’t really seem like a great choice, but the alternative seemed so much worse. I voted against Bush, which, by default, meant for Kerry. I was upset when Bush won.

Now it’s 2008 and we have, for the first time in my life, a candidate that I admire as a politician and as a person. If Barack Obama is elected, I will finally be able to say that I love my president. Do I have problems with him? Yeah, but no one seems to be willing to let me run things (which means they would get done the right way!), so Obama is a good enough alternative.

Also, I can’t endorse someone who is ok with this war that I despise going on for “a hundred years”, doesn’t use a computer in 2008, doesn’t know what a condom does, and who doesn’t believe that women deserve equal pay. The McCain family is worth $136 million, he’s not exactly sure how many houses he owns, but he “doesn’t consider himself a rich man”. In the worlds of William Shatner, I just can’t behind that. There are other, more in-depth tax and economic reasons that I’m voting for Obama, too, but these are the issues, too often dismissed as trivial, that I have with McCain.

I usually don’t think voting on social issues is wise because I think that We The People have more influence on those issues (for now) than any President will. Still, the extreme conservativeness of Palin scares me. I don’t believe extremes in either direction belong in the White House, even as VP. So Obama it is. It’s time to take back the White House from people who will fuck it up even more.