“don’t you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?”

There is something that happens to me when I’m really sick that I’m calling the “puke-awesome” effect.  I feel terrible, and then I throw up, and suddenly there is this miraculous window of time, about ten minutes, where I feel just fine. It fades away quickly and I’m back to the misery I was in before, but those ten minutes are awesome. I can’t explain why it happens.  Does this happen to other people, or is it one of those weird “Only Amber” things that makes everyone think I’m from another planet?

It totally is, isn’t it? Aw man. Now I’m embarrassed.

Anyway, Saturday I took my first antibiotic pill, which said “Can be taken on an empty stomach”, but it was lying. I ended up on my knees with my arms wrapped around the can, and when I sat up I realized I suddenly felt ok. I knew it wouldn’t last, so I started slamming around the bathroom trying to clean up before the rotten feeling came back. I flipped on the shower and hopped in with my toothbrush in one hand and a razor in the other. I hadn’t shaved my legs at this point in about a week, and it was making me about as miserable as the illness itself. I knew I probably wouldn’t have time to comb out my hair even though it needed it, but I got it wet anyway, which felt nice.

Since my hair hasn’t been properly combed in ages, and I went back to bed with it wet, this is what I’m rocking. Rob can’t look at me with a straight face. I’d put on a hat, but none fit over the fro.

It’ll be hell to comb out when the time comes, but in the meantime, it’s a good source of amusement.

You may laugh.